Wednesday, January 13, 2010

It's a Chronic Life


The most unusual side effect of chronic pain is that, after having it for long enough, you no longer notice that it’s there. That is until you have a temporary period of release. But even then, when it comes back, you think for just one moment “this is a normal feeling”. I have had chronic wrist pain for 10 years now, which is amazing because I am only 24. Eight years ago I had surgery, which helped more than I could have hoped for, but I still have pain almost everyday. Some days it’s just a little pain, perhaps a 0.5 on a scale of 1-10. But other days, like today, it will go up to an 8. Rarely since the surgery it will be at a 10. Over the years I have willed myself to accept the pain, just as I accept the fact that I have asthma. Neither health issue should get in the way of me living my life. They do, however, create setbacks. I run slower than other people, I cannot travel as far, and I cannot always hold my pen with grace or knit a row with even tension. It is said that the first step of recovery is acknowledging that you have a problem. Well, I may never be rid of my wrist pain, but coming to terms with it has helped me to learn how to live with it. Life with chronic pain can feel like it’s long, but it’s really too short to make it your focal point.

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